For example, it could be fear of missing an important call from a potential client, or it could be the anticipation of finally getting a response we were waiting for. Research from The Virginia Tech Transportation Institute, which involved 3,500 drivers across a three-year period, shows that using a phone, texting or reading email while driving dramatically increased the probability of a car accident. The ping of a mobile device makes us act on our emotions, tempting us to check in or, even respond, while in traffic. This is one cool-down strategy that is easy to implement and may save you undue embarrassment.But Put That Cellphone DownĮmotional self-control is increasingly important with the omnipresence of our mobile devices. If you're prone to this, you can help guard against it by setting a rule in Outlook to delay sending all emails by a number of minutes. If you're using Gmail, you can use Google's Undo Send feature, which can be set to give you a 30-second delay-just enough time to re-read what you wrote. Make Technology Your Ally.Īll of us have, at one time or other, sent an email in haste that we later regretted. Being mired in others' drama may weaken your own self-control and may cause you to lose focus. Think about giving them your leadership guidance, but consider unhooking yourself from the dysfunctions of others. If some people around you habitually get themselves up a creek, you may want to reconsider jumping in with them. Good leaders care for their people but also know how to keep a healthy distance. In turn, this may help you manage your emotions so that you can consciously and intentionally choose your behaviors. Using this model may help you enhance your emotional intelligence, making you more aware of the effect your thoughts have on your emotions. While this is important for everyone, it's particularly crucial for a business owner or anyone in a leadership position. Did it change how you feel? Did it help you see the situation from a different perspective?Įmotional self-control is our ability to keep disruptive emotions and impulses in check and maintain control over our actions. Ask yourself: What concrete evidence do I have to support this belief? What are all the possible explanations for an unsuccessful cold call? Did I catch the client at an inopportune time? Was the client distracted with other issues? Does this particular client have a preference for email communication rather than phone calls? Analyze all the possible interpretations.Į-Energization: List the thoughts and feelings you now have as a result of analyzing and disputing the negative interpretation you attributed to the event. For example, you may think after an unsuccessful cold call: "I am never good at cold calling." It might put you in a bad mood and affect the rest of your day.Ĭ-Consequences: How do you feel as a result of this belief?ĭ-Disputation: Dispute these automatic beliefs by examining the facts of the situation. Here's how it works:Ī-Adversity: Identify and articulate the adversity.ī-Belief: Identify the automatic belief(s) you have when you experience the adversity. Martin Seligman, a professor of psychology at The University of Pennsylvania. But if we're habitual worriers, this can put a dent in our energy and optimism as we pursue our business agenda.Ī well-known tool that can help to manage worrying is the ABCDE model developed by Dr. The impact of excessive worrying may be worse than the actual issue of concern. Of course, a little worrying is alright: It helps keep us vigilant about our business and may help prevent us from taking undue risks. Worry is the antithesis of emotional self-control. These seven strategies may help increase your emotional self-control when needed: Apply Logic to Your Worries While this is important for everyone, it may be particularly crucial for a business owner or anyone in a leadership position. Emotional self-control is our ability to keep disruptive emotions and impulses in check and maintain control over our actions.
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